Parashat VaYigash-You Are Alive, But Are You Living?

BS’’D

Parashat VaYigash

You Are Alive, But Are You Living?

8. And Pharaoh said to Jacob, "How many are the days of the years of your life?" ח. וַיֹּאמֶר פַּרְעֹה אֶל יַעֲקֹב כַּמָּה יְמֵי שְׁנֵי חַיֶּיךָ: 9. And Jacob said to Pharaoh, "The days of the years of my sojournings are one hundred thirty years. The days of the years of my life have been few and miserable, and they have not reached the days of the years of the lives of my forefathers in the days of their sojournings." ט. וַיֹּאמֶר יַעֲקֹב אֶל פַּרְעֹה יְמֵי שְׁנֵי מְגוּרַי שְׁלֹשִׁים וּמְאַת שָׁנָה מְעַט וְרָעִים הָיוּ יְמֵי שְׁנֵי חַיַּי וְלֹא הִשִּׂיגוּ אֶת יְמֵי שְׁנֵי חַיֵּי אֲבֹתַי בִּימֵי מְגוּרֵיהֶם:

The Midrash notes the manner in which Yaakov responds to Pharaoh formulates an amazing calculation. Yaakov lived to the age of 147 while his father lived until the age of 180. This is a difference of 33 years. The Midrash explains that Yaakov lost 33 years of his life due to the 33 words that were used as he cursed his life's struggles.

Wow, that’s harsh. Imagine what would be if we were held accountable for every word we complained about our lives. HaShem Yerahem….

In order to understand the Midrash one must understand HaRamban (Nachmanides) on diplomacy: World leaders do not normally greet each other with ordinary questions such as, "How old are you?" I am sure President Obama does not question Queen Elizabeth of her age when they get the chance to speak, (she may be too old to remember anyway). Yet that is the only conversation the Torah records about Yaakov’s encounter with Pharaoh.  The Ramban explains that Yaakov looked so aged and distraught that Pharaoh could not comprehend this. He therefore was hinting as to why there is a discrepancy between Yaakov’s appearance and his actual age. And Yaakov explained why.

Do we have more life to our years or years to our life?

How do we look at our lives? Do we live days of emptiness or do we live fulfilled and productive days? Does it take us a year to achieve something that could be done in a week, or do we complete a year’s work within a single day? How do we make use of our time and how do we value it? Are we optimistic and embracing of what life has to offer us or does it bring us down and hinder our development? Do we live diluted lives or do we lead lives of vivacity and exuberance? We must realize that it is not necessarily the years in our life that count; it is the life in our years that matter.

 It is quality, not quantity that counts. Once we internalize this, we can consider what is the means by which to live a fulfilled life.

When Pharaoh asks Yaakov how old he is, Yaakov contends that his years have not reached the years of his father’s years. Why is this reason to be upset about? How does he know he will not reach that age? Nobody ever put a limit on his life; Yaakov could well live over 180 years old! Who was to stop him?? Often times, we do the same thing. We put ourselves down even before we encounter some failure. Even if we have the potential to excel, we automatically set ourselves up to fail before we have even begun.

To live a fulfilled life we must believe we are capable of anything. Nobody puts a limit on what you can do. Nobody can stop you. If you want something that you know is good for you, go seize it. If HaKadosh Barukh Hu sees it fit for you, consider it yours. Nobody can stop you but yourself. It is all in our mindset; keep a positive one.

We must stop counting numbers and weights and start feeling and appreciating instead. Set your own reality and chase it, don’t waste your time sitting idly until it finds you.

Be’ezrat HaShem may we all have the clarity and the rasson (will) to make the best of each passing day feeling only the depth of its quality instead of keeping count of the time that goes by. May each day be more fulfilling and beautiful than its preceding day!

Wishing you all a beautiful, spiritual, uplifting and of course, fulfilling Shabbat Shalom uMevorakh!

Ariella Samimi

Parashat Mikets- Turning Weakness into Strength

B’’SD

Parashat Mikets

Turn You Weakness Into Your Biggest Strength

Kim Peek was born with severe brain damage. His childhood doctor told Kim's father to leave him in an institution and forget about the boy. The doctor believed that Kim's severe developmental disabilities would not let him even walk, let alone to learn anything. Until this day, Kim struggles with ordinary motor skills and has difficulty walking. He is severely disabled, cannot button his shirt and tests well below average on a general IQ test. It seems like Kim is left weak with no hope.

But Kim's father disregarded the doctor's advice.

What Kim can do now is astonishing. He has read 12,000 books and remembers everything about them. Not only that, he reads two pages at once - his left eye reads the left page, and his right eye reads the right page. It takes him about 3 seconds to read through two pages…and he remembers everything written on them. Kim can recall facts and trivial matters from over 15 subject areas. If you tell him a date, Kim can tell you what day of the week it is. He also remembers every piece of music he has ever heard. There is a reason why they call him "Kimputer".

Kim’s biggest weakness, his mental disability, became his strongest characteristic, stronger than that of most people. He didn’t let his weakness take over him; he never gave up.

Last Parasha, Yosef HaSadik goes from being his father’s most beloved son to being abandoned by his own brothers because of one thing: his ability to interpret dreams. Had it not been for the incidents where he attempted to interpret his own dreams, his brothers would not have felt animosity towards him and he would have been able to live peacefully as home together with his family. But instead, he ends up in some dungeon in Egypt waiting for the day he will be set free.

In this Parasha, Parashat Mikets, we see Yosef HaSadik promoted from prisoner to prince. But what suddenly got him there? Yosef interprets one set of dreams about seven fat, healthy cows being consumed by seven thin cows, and a second set about seven healthy, full stalks of corn being consumed by seven unhealthy, thin stalks. Yosef explains to Pharaoh that the dreams mean that there will soon be seven years of plenty followed by seven years of famine, and that Pharaoh needs to appoint a minister to take care of this. Of course, Pharaoh appoints Yosef to take care of the grain during the expected famine, and Yosef goes from being the second from the bottom among his brothers to second from top of an entire civilization. It was Yosef’s very ability to interpret dreams that rewarded him this pristine position- the same ability that got him into trouble and sent away in the first place.

The Torah HaKedosha is making a very powerful statement here.

Our weaknesses have the potential to become our biggest strength. If you want to know what the biggest strength you have is, look at what you consider to be your biggest weakness is; it lies beneath, it just needs to be unleashed. For instance, if I have a supposed weakness of forgetfulness, that is where I then tend to focus my most attention and try to develop; I finally end up with an astounding memory. If I know I have the predisposition to answer people impulsively, I develop exactly that trait into one of patience and consideration. Remember, Yosef HaSadik used his exact ‘weakness’ as his primary strength. Sure, interpreting dreams got him into prison but this exact ability also got him out of prison.

We must learn to embrace our weaknesses. When we deem something as a weakness, we don’t focus on developing it so we ignore it and it goes unnoticed. But we can use this exact power to develop ourselves further, we just never properly realized the need for it. Within our specific weakness is a reserve that is untapped. It is never look at or considered. We must realized that this very characteristic we consider weak is fresh, brand new, untouched—and can be turned into something more. The very fact that we have a weakness forces us to look inside ourselves. A weakness is an alarm, a bell, it gets your attention, it is clay in your hands. You can squeeze it out of frustration or you can sculpt it into a masterpiece. If we didn’t have any weaknesses, or if we didn’t acknowledge them and considered ourselves just to have strengths, then we coast through life and remain stagnant, we don’t grow.

Once we can acknowledge what our weakness is, we can begin the process. Anytime we are faced with an experience depending on that weakness of ours, view it as an opportunity for GROWTH, not as an obstacle! If you are open to change, use every chance you get to allow you to hone this character and sharpen it. If you let it go and brush it off as a small imperfection, you are missing out on your greatest potential.

Weaknesses give us the momentum to move forward. Since we find ourselves on one extreme (‘weakness’), we are brought to a point where we must put ourselves on the other extreme (strength) to counter it. The farther on one extreme of the spectrum, the more potential there is to flip it to the other end.

 I was once washing cherry tomatoes. They were all average in their cleanliness- they looked pretty clean to me, so I gave them a general rinse and scrub and set them out to eat. As I was arranging these cute little tomatoes, one fell to the floor before I was able to catch it. I quickly picked up the tomato and realized it was very dirty, so I sprayed it with vegetable wash and began to scrub frantically for a few minutes until I was positive it was completely clean. In fact, it was cleaner than any other tomato on the plate.

Okay, other than getting you hungry, what is my point here? When we realize something has a deficit, we work harder to fix it and emerge with something even greater than when we started. Yeah, that last tomato had a fall and got the dirtiest, but it also ended up becoming the most clean out of the entire bunch. When we realize we may have a deficit, we work harder to compensate for it and we end up with a strength we never had to begin with.

Be’ezrat HaShem, may we all be given the strength to develop our strengths and embrace what we consider weaknesses with the understanding that beneath them lays tremendous power for growth.

Wishing everyone a Shabbat Shalom uMevorakh!

Ariella Samimi

The Miracle of Hanukka

B’’SD

Please learn the following for the iluy Neshama of Shmuel ben Daniel v'Hadassah and continue to learn and daven, she'Tehiyeh Nishmato Tserura beTsror haHayim.

Fill in the blank. ‘The            of Hanukka ’

Chances are, one of you answered ‘The Miracle of Hanukka’ (Okay, ‘Festival’ is good too). But what is so miraculous about Hanukka? So big deal, we won a war and the oil took a little longer to burn. Why do we need to institute eight entire days of the year to commemorate and celebrate this miracle?? One day would surely suffice! If you think about it, Hanukka is the longest holiday of the year; Pesah and Succot only last seven days according to the Torah!

What is Hanukka? The sages learned that on the 25th day of Kislev, the days of Hanukka are eight ... (Talmud Shabbat)

The Sefat Emet points out the emphasis on the word eight.  If we can understand the significance of this number, we unravel the secret behind the miracle that transpired on this day.

To understand the essence of the number ‘eight’, first let us learn what the meaning of ‘seven’ is so we can create a firm basis on which to build upon.

The Ancient Greek civilization revolved around a logical and systematic perfection. Their culture commended the cultivation of humans to their most natural form. This is why much focus was given to athleticism, the arts and philosophical reasoning. Beauty was translated into symmetry and proportion; everything had to fit into a rigid mold, otherwise it was deemed imperfect and unnatural. The Greeks’ vision of reality was limited to what the human eye can perceive. They maintained the notion that nothing can be accepted if it cannot be proven by logic. Only things that can be seen or measured were valued; there was no above and no beyond.

According to Yehadut, revolving around the number seven is the system of nature. The seven day week, the seven year crop cycle, the seven missvot of Benei Noah, all revolve around how we have limits in this world. Within nature, there are limits in the form of time and space (think gravity or not having enough time to read as many Divrei Torah as we would like). We cannot extend past these functions and must learn to accommodate them; we cannot go above and we cannot go beyond them.  

Nature is predictable (if I plant a seed, it will grow) and therefore can be repeated; it is bound to a system, it is trapped in a cycle. Nature will always remain the same, it cannot become something it never was before; there is no above and no beyond what once was.

If seven connotates a repetitive cycle, eight signifies breaking free from this cycle. Eight signifies going above and beyond the pattern of nature. The word for eight in Hebrew is ‘Shemonah’ if we rearrange the letters, this spells out the word ‘Neshamah’. Our Neshama, our Soul, is certainly not bound by the laws of nature; it lasts forever, it goes above and beyond life as we know it. Let’s keep going with this idea. The word ‘Mishnah’ is the building block of the Torah she’Be’al Peh (the Oral Torah). Is it not the extension of the Torah she’Biketav, the Written Torah? If we take the root of the word ‘Shemonah’ we are left with ‘Shemen’ – Oil, the very core of our festival of Hanukka! Again, olive oil is an extension of the olive, it is more than meets the eye, the hidden essence behind what we think we see.

The concept of eight, of Neshama, of the Oral Torah, of oil, rises and rides high above and beyond the confines of nature. Eight encompasses the sphere by which are enriching and extending things that exist in the form of nature, in the form of seven. Eight is above and beyond, it is an extension of the natural, a step above seven, above nature.

The Sefat Emet maintains that the threat of the Greeks was not the physical worship of idols; it was rather the philosophy that nothing is sacred. Their secularist world view was that only the physical was important, not the metaphysical. This was a spiritual war, not a physical one. We learn from the miracle of Hanukka that there is a world that completely transcends that of the natural world we live in. We must strive to become the supernatural beings we are given the potential to become.

If you noticed, on Hanukka we spin the sevivon, the dreidel, from the top, as opposed to the raashanim, groggers, we use on Purim, which we spin from the bottom. This signifies our desire and motive this time of year to reach upwards, into the realm above nature, beyond logic and reason. We must prepare ourselves to be receptive of miracles coming from above, from HaKadosh Barukh Hu, and not from below, from our own efforts. Sure, winning a war and oil staying lit may seem like the natural way the world may take its course, but it is exactly in these moments we must realize they are truly products coming from a place way above nature.

Be’Ezrat HaShem Yitbarak may we all develop the sensitivity to realize that we are constantly receiving miracles from a Source way above us and may HaKadosh Barukh Hu continue to send many many more in the form of berakha and sheaf for all of Kelal Yisrael!

Wishing everybody a super festive Hag Hanukka!!!! Hanukka Sameah!!!

Ariella Samimi :D

Inspiration: Rabbi Doniel Katz and Rabbi Label Lam

Parashat VaYeshev- Do You See the Big Picture?

B’’SD

When Reuven, the eldest of the twelve shevatim hears that his brothers are devising a plan to kill their youngest brother Yosef, he tries to convince them out of it. The Torah writes of him:

21. But Reuven heard, and he delivered him out of their hands, and he said, "Let us not deal him a deadly blow."

כא. וַיִּשְׁמַע רְאוּבֵן וַיַּצִּלֵהוּ מִיָּדָם וַיֹּאמֶר לֹא נַכֶּנּוּ נָפֶשׁ:

On my most recent trip to Eres Yisrael, while spending time at the Tahana Merkazi in Yerushalayim, I walked by a photo store and noticed mounted on a display was a large eye-catching photograph. Naturally, I drew nearer and observed the photograph closely. I realized that this large photo was made of hundreds of smaller photos that came together to create one uniform image. I surveyed each picture closely and considered its relevance to the main picture. I realized that no matter the content of each picture, if it was shifted even a little to the right or the left, it would ruin the continuity of the big picture. Each picture belonged exactly where it was put, and if it was missing, the big picture would no longer make sense.

Life is all about seeing the bigger picture, even when the small pictures do not seem to relate- they all belong there, they are all necessary. Sometimes, we go through an experience and we cannot fathom how it could possibly contribute to our lives, we cannot understand where this piece fits in, but know that if this piece was missing, the grand picture of our lives would be distorted.

We must embrace each experience in our lives….even if we don’t understand them. They all belong where they are put.

The Midrash Raba on Sefer VaYikra tells us that had Reuven known that the Torah would write about him, "And Reuven heard it, and he delivered him out of their hands," he would have loaded Yosef on his shoulders and carried him back to his father.

What is the significance of this Midrash?

As part of human nature, we perceive an experience differently during the experience itself than after the experience, when looking at the big picture. We must understand that Reuven has no idea that his life will be recorded in the Torah, but if he knew that his whole life would be written down as one continuous story, one with a beginning and an end, he would have acted differently and carried Yosef home on his own shoulders. Why?

While he is with his brothers, he has no concept of what the big picture is at that point. He makes a simply decision to save his younger brother, he does not know what will come next. However, if one is granted the privilege of an overview of their life from beginning to end, they can understand exactly where this ‘picture’ fits in and why they must be experiencing it.

Just think, if our lives were written down, what would our story look like? What would our big picture be? Would it have vacant spots? Consider your actions in the big picture of your life, not only within its passing moments.

If I go through life with an open mind that, even though I do not understand why I might be going through this but I know I have to be, things become more endurable. We find relief knowing the very fact that we are meant to go be going through this. HaKadosh Barukh Hu is the artist of our life portrait. Could we ask for a more meticulous painter than that? Rest assured, He leaves out no details.

It was because Yosef understood this concept that he was able to reach the level that he did. Just imagine to yourself what Yosef had to endure. Just imagine the thoughts going through his head as he sat in the pit his brothers threw him in. Imagine the shame and betrayal he felt as he was standing there waiting for his brothers to sell him to Yishmaelim. What was Yosef feeling as he sat in the back of the caravan on his way to Misrayim alone, with absolutely no concept of where he is being taken to. What did this seventeen year old boy tell himself when Potiphar’s wife accused him of violating her by which he was thrown into prison? Yosef realized that each of these small instances were vivid strokes of color in his beautiful portrait of life.

All that Yosef endured was not for nothing. What was his reward? He was called Safnat Pa’aneah, ‘Revealer of Secrets’. Yosef was given the ability to see further, he was able to reveal the big picture.

The Midrash Rabbah (85:1) offers a glimpse into the heavenly orchestration that accompanies our earthly actions:

‘Rabbi Shemuel Bar Nahman, when expounding on our Parsha would open his words with the following verse from Yirmiyahu (29:11): 'The thoughts that I'm thinking on them, says HaShem, are thoughts of peace and not evil, in order to give a future and a hope.' The tribes were involved in the sale of Yosef, Yosef was involved in his sackcloth and his fasting, Reuven was involved in his sackcloth and his fasting, Yaakov was involved in his sackcloth and his fasting, Yehuda was involved in finding himself a wife while HaShem was involved in creating the light of the Mashiah.’

While we are mourning that which appears to be destruction, HaKadosh Barukh Hu is busy constructing the light of Mashiah!

This message is extremely powerful. At times when we feel that the picture does not belong, it could become the picture that defines our lives; we do not know what is behind it. Maybe we do not understand why that specific picture is there, but when we take a step back, we can see how it complements the overall picture.

The Maggid of Dubna explains that there are two means through which HaKadosh Barukh Hu delivers His goodness to us. Sometimes, HaShem sends down good in the form of honor, success and wealth. Other times, the berakhot come filtered through situations which appear to be the opposite, yet they are all necessary, and therefore all for the good.

Rav Yisroel Ciner explains that this is comparable to a tailor producing a garment. Upon receiving elaborate pieces of expensive silk, the tailor ‘attacks’ the silk with large scissors, cutting it into different sizes and shapes, seemingly tearing it apart. An unknowledgeable onlooker would think that he has performed an act of destruction. A wiser person understands that these preliminary ‘destructive’ actions are necessary in order to produce a garment that will far surpass the silk material in both beauty and function.

Be’ezrat HaShem, may we all develop the understanding that each and every experience we endure has been beautifully orchestrated in the grand scheme of our lives and is most necessary to complete a beautiful portrait we can be proud to display in front of HaShem Himself.

Wishing each and every one of you a Shabbat Shalom uMevorakh!

Ariella Samimi :)

Parashat VaYishlah-Do we respond with Gratitude or Attitude?

B’’SD

Parashat VaYishlah


Please learn the following for the Refua Shelema beKarov of Mordechai ben Iran  and Menachem ben Eshter. Please continue to daven for their Refua. BH may we only have bessorot tovot!

Do we respond with Gratitude or Attitude?

11. I have become small from all the kindnesses and from all the truth that You have rendered Your servant, for with my staff I crossed this Jordan, and now I have become two camps.		יא. קָטֹנְתִּי מִכֹּל הַחֲסָדִים וּמִכָּל הָאֱמֶת אֲשֶׁר עָשִׂיתָ אֶת עַבְדֶּךָ כִּי בְמַקְלִי עָבַרְתִּי אֶת הַיַּרְדֵּן הַזֶּה וְעַתָּה הָיִיתִילִשְׁנֵי מַחֲנוֹת:

You wake up the morning of an important final or meeting already half an hour late; you slept through the alarm. With eyes half open you quickly throw anything on (your socks don’t match), gather your belongings, and with one shoe on, dash out the door. By the time you finally make it to school or work, you notice all the parking spots have been taken. You drive around five minutes, ten minutes, twenty minutes….there are no spots to be found; you get desperate. There is nothing left to do but look up at the sky (through the sunroof, of course) and shout, “Master of the universe! I swear I will give 10 percent of my earnings to sedaka each year, pray three times a day, start a Torah study group in my home, I’ll wait six hours between meat and dairy foods. I only just need a place to park right now!”

Just as you finish your heart-wrenching plea, a guy pulls out of a parking spot right in front of you, by which you turn to HaShem and say, ‘Never mind, I found a spot!’

Does this story sound too familiar?

We all want to be successful. When we finally find it, we can respond in one of two ways: we can show Gratitude to HaKadosh Barukh Hu for providing us with this berakha out of His Mercy and Kindness, or we can have Attitude that we deserved it all along and it even then, it took too long to reach us. We can either be humble or we can be arrogant. The question remains, do we forget HaShem after he blesses us?

‘I have become small from all the kindnesses and from all the truth that You have rendered Your servant….’

Just as Yaakov Avinu hears that his brother who is seeking his life is approaching his camp, and he understands that he is at risk of losing all his family and possessions, this is his reaction.

Rabbi Schneur Zalman of Liadi explains that Yaakov had every right to be arrogant for everything he was blessed with. We see the multitudes off offspring he was surrounded with and we can easily survey his wealth based on the lavish gift he presents Esav. However, despite all of this berakha, Yaakov expressed utmost humility and deems himself unworthy of it all.

We learn that not only do we have to be thankful for the good that HaShem blesses us with, but we also have to be grateful for the ‘bad’, for even when Yaakov Avinu’s life and family were at stake, his initial reaction was that of thanks.

We must understand that there is no such thing as bad being done to us. What would possibly be the purpose of HaShem presenting us with something negative? Revenge? Anger? HaShem doesn’t need to play games. Ultimately, everything ends up for the greater good, we just have to be patient enough to see the big picture. When we realize everything comes from HaShem, we realize that literally everything is also good.

Gam Zu leTova, Everything is for the good.

That is why seemingly ‘bad’ things happen. Not to push us away, but because these things are really good things that happen to us. For this we must be thankful. By being thankful, we strengthen our connection to HaShem Yitbarakh. If has ve’Shalom we become arrogant, we are asking HaShem to move over a little to make room for us, because we think we know what we deserve, and not only that, we want it when it is convenient for us.

The more humble we are, the closer we become to HaShem and the more deserving we are of His berakhot. If we become arrogant and believe we must take things into our own hands, we will be left to fend for ourselves. Let’s see how successful that person will become….

So how do we become humble?

WHEN WE REALIZE WHO EVERYTHING IS COMING FROM, WE BECOME HUMBLED. WHEN WE REALIZE IT IS ALL COMING FROM HAKADOSH BARUKH HU HOW COULD WE POSSIBLY BELIEVE THAT IT IS OUR OWN PERSONAL EFFORT THAT GAINED US WHAT WE HAVE IN LIFE?

We become humble only by expressing gratitude to HaShem. We tell HaKadosh Barukh Hu, Ribono Shel Olam, I know that I would never have been able to achieve this on my own. It is solely YOU who graces me with this abundance of berakha, I am but undeserving. Even if I do not understand the situation right now, I know it is for the best. So THANK YOU for providing me with everything I need, even when I am considered unworthy of such a gift from You.

Be’ezrat HaShem may we all develop the humility to understand that anything that comes our way is a reflection of HaShem’s Mercy and Love, and by no means a direct product of our own efforts. May this humility grants us the ability to become thankful for each situation we are faced with and yield may more berakhot to come!

Shabbat Shalom uMevorakh!

Ariella Samimi

Sources: Chabad.org, based on Tanya, Part II (Igeret Hakodesh), Epistle 2, and Likkutei Sichot, vol. 5, p. 396.

Parashat VaYesse

B’’SD

Please learn the following for teh Refua Shelema BeKarov of Menachem ben Esther and continue davening for his Refua

Parashat VaYesse

Rebbe Menachem Mendel of Kotzk poses the question: Where is HaShem? To which he answers: Wherever HaShem is allowed to enter.

As a child, the board game Chutes and Ladders was a favorite. The point of the game is to be the first to reach the 100 mark before all the other players regardless of how many ladders you climbed or chutes you slid down. You just had to get there first.  If you got lucky, you would land on 80 and climb up a ladder straight to the 100 mark and win. Just the same way, sometimes you would reach all the way until 98, just two away from the goal! But would have to slide down all the way to 78 and lose primacy.

Life shouldn’t have to work this way.

In Parashat VaYesse, Yaakov Avinu leaves his home town of Be’er Sheba on his way to Haran. As night falls, he rests his head on several stones and drifts into sleep. Yaakov Avinu dreams of a sulam, a ladder connecting Shamayim (Heaven) and Aress (Earth) with malakhim, angels, climbing and descending it. HaKadosh Barukh Hu then appears to him and promises that the land upon which he is laying will be given to his descendants. Yaakov Avinu then designates the stone upon which he laid his head on as a monument to be made as a House of G-d.

The Torah is not a mere storybook, nor is it one to relay history. Each and every letter, word, pasuk and story possesses within it a much more profound meaning and connection to other realms in the world. This incident with Yaakov Avinu begs the question: What is the significance of Yaakov Avinu’s dream? What can we learn from it? Even if we do discover the true meaning, Yaakov Avinu is on a level far higher than us!  How could it even be possible for us to apply this on a more personal level?

Among a plethora of many different interpretations of Yaakov Avinu’s dream, including that of the Ramban, The Kotzker Rebbe also contemplated the meaning of the sulam and arrives at a spiritual theory of relativity, says Rabbi Shekel.  The Rebbe asked his students, who was higher on the ladder? The person at the top or the one at the bottom? We may think to ourselves, obviously the one on top, just like in the game! However, there is no definitive answer; it depends on where one is going, on whether an individual is ascending or descending within his own life’s context.  The person at the top might initially seem higher, but if he is spiritually on the chute, he is actually lower than the person on the spiritual ladder who is moving upwards. A person might be on 73 which is only 27 spots away from a 100 but be lower than somebody on 67, who is 33 spots away. It is all relative to the direction they are moving. The one who got to 73 just went down a chute from 93 while the one on 67 got there from 51. The question here is, who is making the most progress?

Sometimes, it is not all about what level you stand on, it is about how much you are moving upwards.

PROGRESS is of prime importance here, not stature. Sometimes, in life we are so concerned with advancing all the way to the top that we can overlook what is around us. We leave so much behind all for the pursuit of being ‘the best’, that one goal always in mind. We close ourselves off to the world for our own selfish benefit of becoming the best (sometimes intentionally and sometimes we do not even realize this). For some, it is unacceptable to be on any level lower; second place just doesn’t cut it. But regardless of where we find ourselves, HaKadosh Barukh Hu is always there. That is why while the malakhim are busy ascending and descending, the pasuk says ‘HaShem was standing beside him’. There is never a top or bottom here. No matter what level you’re on HaKadosh Barukh Hu  is right there next to you. The only thing we must do is to keep moving upward. Do not get overwhelmed by how far a goal seems to be. For us it should matter how large ladders are or how far down the chute you slide, it is not about necessarily getting the 100. Just remember: step by step exactly like Yaakov Avinu’s ladder. Sure, at time there are setbacks and we can slide down a small chute, but this should only motivate us to regain our position and move forward and climb bigger ladders; as long as we are generally moving upward overall.

Sometimes we cant see our own feet below because we are too busy looking upward at the goal, and sometimes we cannot even see the next rung because we are so intent on remaining where we currently stand, however, in both cases, HaShem is standing next to us, always. The opportunity to experience kedusha is not in the distant, intanglible future, nor is it lodged in the past. Rather, it is here at every moment.  In the words of the Kotzker Rebbe: Where is HaShem? Wherever HaShem is allowed to enter.

Be’ezrat HaShem may we all have the koah to keep striving upwards, our goal being that of progress. Wishing everybody a Shabbat Shalom uMevorakh!

Ariella Samimi

Parashat Toldot, The One Rule You Need to Know to Attain Humility

B’’SD
Please learn the following for the ilui Neshama of Iran bat Socrola 

Parashat Toldot

The One Rule You Need to Know to Attain Humility

18. And Isaac again dug the wells of water which they had dug in the days of his father, Abraham, and the Philistines had stopped them up after Abraham's death; and he gave them names like the names that his father had given them.

יח. וַיָּשָׁב יִצְחָק וַיַּחְפֹּר אֶת בְּאֵרֹת הַמַּיִם אֲשֶׁר חָפְרוּ בִּימֵי אַבְרָהָם אָבִיו וַיְסַתְּמוּם פְּלִשְׁתִּים אַחֲרֵי מוֹת אַבְרָהָם וַיִּקְרָא לָהֶן שֵׁמוֹת כַּשֵּׁמֹת אֲשֶׁר קָרָא לָהֶן אָבִיו:

If there is one middah (character trait) that counters the development of a Jewish neshama and can practically shatter all human potential, it is the middah of arrogance. If you think about it, anger, envy and lust are all derivatives that stem from the single root of arrogance. To cleanse ourselves of these qualities of anger, envy, and lust (which are all capable of literally destroying lives), all we have to do is uproot the quality of arrogance from our psyche and we are left with true humility. And so explains the Ramban. To attain true Yiraat Shamayim, HaRamban writes in his Iggeret HaRamban that the precursor to attaining Awe of HaShem Yitbarakh is humility. And how do we reach this level? He writes:

‘Speak gently at all times, with your head bowed, your eyes looking down to the ground and your heart focusing on Hashem. Don't look at the face of the person to whom you are speaking. Consider everyone as greater than yourself. …In all your actions, words and thoughts, always regard yourself as standing before Hashem, with His Shekhinah above you, for His glory fills the whole world. Speak with fear and awe, as a slave standing before his master. Act with restraint in front of everyone. When someone calls you, don't answer loudly, but gently and softly, as one who stands before his master.’

As Yisshak Avinu proceeded along his trajectory through Eres Yisrael, he began to amass substantial wealth, and evidently, a renowned name for himself. Despite fame and fortune being a premise to invoke a man’s inner conceit, we can see no trace of arrogance on Yisshak Avinu’s part. Before Yisshak Avinu traveled around this land, he realized that somebody else had already done it before him; His father, Avraham Avinu. Avraham Avinu had the custom of digging wells of water along the routes he would take during his journeys. In Parashat Toldot, Yisshak Avinu re-digs some of the wells that his father had initially dug. Time and time again, Yisshak was envied of his wealth and viewed as a threat to the Kena’anim (Philistines) so they took his wells and asked him to leave. Each time Yisshak Avinu re-digs a well, he does not change its name; he calls it by the same name that his father had called it.

            Yisshak Avinu realized that there was an authority higher than him and he did not try to change it; he accepts it. This is the key to achieving true humility, to accept. We must realize that we are not in control of the things that happen to us and a higher authority takes care of things for us. We must learn to let go. If we are able to smash our egos and realize that we cannot always have it our way, that sometimes, what others tell us is the ideal path and for once maybe they are right, we learn the essence of humility. Again, here we accept what others tell us.

On an intrapersonal level, if we can let go of our expectations and work with what we have, with the reality that we face, not only do we become successful in our endeavors, we also achieve utmost humility. It is no longer about ‘me’; it is about what needs to be done, about the task at hand, about the greater good. We accept what we are presented with and we get over ourselves.

In life we are given wells. Some are dried up and some flow with luscious water. The structure and foundation of the well is already set. But we do not control how much water flows beneath the wells infrastructure. We make do with the water that rises. As much as you worry and stand over the well and plow and hire the best workers and try to set everything up perfectly so that a system is set up where nothing can go wrong, this will never determine whether or not water will rise up from the ground. It all depends on the authority above us; it depends on HaKadosh Barukh Hu.

We must understand that we can never design a ‘fool-proof life’. He who does is the fool himself. This is comparable to students who spend more time and effort to create a ‘cheat-sheet’ for a test instead of sitting and actually studying for it. In generating a cheat-sheet, we are essentially saying ‘I have authority enough to guarantee my success on this exam.’ But we don’t. Who are we to be our own guarantors? Nothing in life is guaranteed, so do not waste your time constructing a scheme elaborate enough to withstand the tests you think you will be facing. If it is meant to fall through, it will fall through regardless of your plot and proposals. The more we set up a specific expectation for how something will happen, the more likelihood that we will let ourselves down. Your expectations and plans are trapped within the sphere of your skull. How is the world supposed to relate to this? Only you know what is going on in your heart and your head, this by no means can relay to the world how it should be run. So when things do not go as we envision them (Why should they? We are but one tiny speck in the grand scheme of things), we become discouraged and frustrated. This is all for naught. The only thing you can do is to accept the world and to make the change inside yourself, a change directed towards humility.

Just like Yisshak Avinu did not change the name of the wells, we should not try to change the lot we are given in life. In both cases we accept what has been handed to us. It is not about the cards we are dealt in life; it is how we play them. It was never about the name of the well; it is about the lucid waters that flow beneath. In the case of Yisshak Avinu, he realized that somebody of a higher stature has been there before him who knows better and to this authority did he defer. Likewise, we must realize that no matter where we find ourselves, somebody has already been there before. That somebody is HaKadosh Barukh Hu. To Him we must defer.

May we all achieve the humility necessary to internalize these concepts and by doing so, reinvigorate all those wells we have let dry, bringing forth an abundance of berakha similar to those bestowed upon Avraham, Yisshak and Yaakov Avinu.

Shabbat Shalom u’Mevorakh!

            Ariella Samimi

Parashat Hayei Sarah: What is Our Purpose in This Life?

B’’SD

Parashat Hayei Sarah

If Sarah Imenu passes away in second pasuk of the Parasha, then why is this Parasha called HAYEI Sarah, the LIFE of Sarah? By understanding why she passed on, we can learn what she lived for. Sarah Imenu’s life is defined by her death.

Sarah Imenu's neshama departs from her when she hears news that her son Yisshak is being given as sacrifice, as Rashi clarifies. The satan shows her the image of Avraham Avinu placing Yisshak down on mizbeah (altar) and binding him down. Traditionally, we learn that this is the reason that Sarah Imenu’s neshama leaves her. This image is understandably disturbing enough for a mother to be distraught over her son, but says the Divrei Shemuel that this is not the reason why Sarah Imenu passes away. He explains that the satan also shows her the image of Avraham Avinu taking Yisshak off of the mizbeah and ultimately not offering him as a korban (sacrifice). This is what affected Sarah Imenu to the point of passing away. She was devastated by the fact that perhaps she did not raise a son worthy enough of being even a korban, that chas ve’shalom he had a moum (blemish) rendering him unworthy (as is the protocol with animal sacrifices).  This bears a powerful message to us.

Just think to yourself, if you were offered a korban, would YOU be complete enough to qualify as a sacrifice or are we not even of this caliber? Do we have a moum? If so, what are they? When we focus on what they are and define them, we can then work on fixing them. 

To do so, we must realize what our goal even is and what our purpose is in this world....

 Avraham Avinu says to Benei Het:

4. ‘I am a stranger and a resident amongst you…’

ד. גֵּר וְתוֹשָׁב אָנֹכִי עִמָּכֶם...

Says the Lubavitcher Rebbe, a Jew is a ‘resident’ in the world considering that we are physically grounded here and surrounded by worldly things. The Torah instructs us not escape this physical reality but rather to inhabit it and elevate it. Yet at the same time, we are complete strangers to this world. A person’s true home is a higher and holier place, a spiritual world of G-dliness which our neshamot strive to reach. By detaching ourselves from this world and deeming ourselves strangers to it, we are able to maintain the spiritual integrity needed to elevate our neshamot to the level of HaShem’s home and meanwhile, to sanctify the world around us in order for HaShem’s Shekhinah to reside here.

There is a story of a visitor who stopped by the home of the Hassid Rabbi DovBer of Mezheritch, who lived a simple life in a home devoid of any furnishing or luxury except an assortment of rough wooden planks and blocks that served as benches for his students during the day and as beds for his family at night. The visitor asks in astonishment ‘Rebbi, with all due respect, how can you live like this? I myself am far from wealthy, but at least in my home Barukh HaShem you will find the basic necessities like chairs, a table, beds...Why don’t you have any furniture?’

Rabbi DovBer deftly responds by asking the visitor ‘Well, where is your furniture?’

Taken somewhat aback, the visitor answers the Rav ‘Rabbi, I am just traveling. I do not take my possessions with me everywhere I go. I am simply a visitor here; I will soon return to my own home where I keep all of my furniture. For now, I do not need those furnishings on my journey.’

‘Ah, yes’ says Rabbi DovBer ‘but I am also just a traveler….’ 

Rabbi DovBer’s answer to his visitor defines our purpose in this world. We are simple travelers. We travel from one world to the next; there is no need to carry over our worldly possessions during our journey. What purpose does this serve us?

In Pirkei Avot we learn that this world is like a corridor that leads to a grand living room, the next world, Olam HaBa. We must prepare ourselves in the corridor so that we can be ready when we reach the living room. Either we can walk around at a leisurely pace, distracted by the paintings hanging on the wall or the intricacies of the wall moldings, forgetting our destination; or we can have our goal in mind and walk directly into the living room, ultimately receiving a much greater benefit than enjoying the beauty of mere paintings. The narrower the corridor, the longer we stand there, the more discomfort we feel there, the more rest and comfort we will find when we finally reach the living room and seat ourselves on its lofty couches and sink into its delicious cushioned seats. In this life, the more hardships we endure, the longer we are kept on our feet, the narrower its straits, the more joy we can pull from the World to Come. This life is a preparation for the next. The better we can prepare ourselves in this life, the more ready we will be in Olam HaBa. All decisions, experiences and struggles in this world are preparation, to cultivate our neshama and develop the spiritual receptors we need to thrive in a spiritual world above. Keep this in mind. Anytime we are faced with a challenge or decision, ask yourself: Is this contributing to the development of my neshama or chas ve’Shalom, detracting from it? This is our purpose in this life.

We can understand the magnitude of this concept with the following analogy. This world is to the next as Friday is to Shabbat Kodesh. During Shabbat we are not permitted to do any work; we therefore are dependent on the preparations we make on Friday to carry us through Shabbat Kodesh. If we don’t get it done on Friday, there is no other time to do it. If you do not cook on Friday, you will be left with nothing to eat on Shabbat- and there is nothing you can do about it; you will be left hungry on Shabbat. The better we prepare on Friday, the more meaningful and comfortable our Shabbat will be. Fridays are often the most hectic and busy days of the week. How early do we wake up, how much do we run around, how many errands do we take care of, how much do we clean, how many meals do we cook, how many guests do we invite all on Friday in order to contribute to our Shabbat experience??? This is certainly not easy work. But do we complain? No! Because we know the payoff. We work this hard because we know the beauty of Shabbat Kodesh. We realize the spiritual levels we are capable to reach on Shabbat Kodesh and we are more than willing and even happy to take on all the responsibilities that we do take upon ourselves on Fridays. It’s worth the investment.

If we even realized what levels we are able to reach in Olam HaBa, we would make a corresponding investment in this life for the next. It is surely worth it. Sometimes it may seem difficult, and sometimes you may feel like you are working to no avail, but every single action you do is contributing more and more to your preparation for the next world. If you do not make your preparations in this world, if you do not cook the meals you need, you will be left starving in the next world- and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it then; it is too late.

Sarah Imenu was well aware of her purpose in this life. It is this reason that she never really dies; she just transitions from this world to the next. Perhaps this is why this Parasha is called ‘Hayei Sarah’, the LIFE of Sarah. This realization allows her to live on, she never really dies. Perhaps this is also why is it called ’Hayei Sarah’ in the plural, implying that she lived on life after the next.

May HaKadosh Barukh Hu grant us the clarity and integrity to realize which of our decisions and experiences truly contribute to the development of our neshama in order to prepare ourselves to become spiritually receptive to the beauty of the Next World that awaits us.

Wishing you a Shabbat Shalom u’Mevorakh out of this world!

Ariella Samimi